Saturday, May 17, 2003  

Mimi is my best friend, outside of Nick. She is an incredible woman bursting with enthusiasm and optimism. Some days, I will be completely down, and if I have some sort of brief interaction with her on AIM or read her blog, my day will be instantly brighter. She is very dear to my heart. Mimi always has good insight into lots of things and gives me a better perspective on what's important, even when she doesn't realize what she's doing. Like today. I spent my whole day today calling and emailing companies for possible internships, and kept getting turned down because I'd missed their deadlines or because I wasn't very qualified for the positions. So I was pretty bummed. I was faced with the growing realization that I might not get an internship this summer. Which, of course, interfered with the BIG PLAN. Part of the BIG PLAN was to get an internship this summer that would help me with my future career. I felt like a failure that I haven't gotten an internship yet, and that it's too late to apply for most anymore. I was just taking my rejection pretty hard. Then I read Mimi's blog for today, and I found out that her father lost his job -- and suddenly all of my worries seemed petty compared to that. I realized that I was being too hard on myself. Getting an internship is important, but if I don't and I have to end up working for Mary Ella again, I'll just suck it up. At least I can earn and save up some money. Everything will be ok. No matter what happens.

j posted this at 12:45 AM.

Friday, May 16, 2003  

I didn't get the internship I interviewed for last week. Sigh. I heard back from them yesterday saying that they'd found someone else.

Well, I'm all moved back now. I have nothing to do. I'll be sitting around the house for two weeks until I can get some transportation somewhere. Sigh. Hopefully, I will not have to work for Mary Ella again this summer, but who knows. I might have to! *Cringe* I just can't really find it tolerable to work there when none of my friends are there too. There's no one really to keep me company.

Yesterday, I was cleaning up all the stuff I moved home with me, and I washed out all my contacts cases. It was only an hour after I did so that I realized I'd also washed out the case with my contacts in it!!! So, I washed my contacts down the drain without even knowing it! Sigh. Yesterday was a bad day. >:(

j posted this at 12:01 PM.

Tuesday, May 13, 2003  

Everyone's gone. It's creepy being here alone ... the place ECHOES. I don't know why it never bothered me before to be the last to leave, but this year, it's weirding me out.

Maybe I'm just depressed Nick is gone.

j posted this at 3:47 PM.

Monday, May 12, 2003  

I'm sad. Nick just left. :*( He's going to be gone all summer; THREE MONTHS! Waaaahhh! I was sniffling in my corner of the room, and Shannon was like, "Um, are you ok? Are you sick or something?" Hee. She's so cute.

Nick's parents are fun people. I like them. :)

Nick got all his stuff to fit in one minivan. How crazy is that?! All MY stuff would not fit in one minivan. I guess it's lucky I live near here, so I can make multiple trips with my things. I have too much stuff!

All in all, I think the whole separation/send-off thing did not turn out as badly as I had envisioned it in my head. I thought I was going to be bawling when the moment came, but I didn't really. I put on a brave face. Hee. I cried some tears, and then I kind of ran away because I didn't want to see him walk away. But I only got a couple steps away before I turned back to the gate, opened it, and waved bye as he drove away in his parents' van. Aww ... it was pretty sad. Then I got home and started bawling. :( *sniffle**sniffle*

j posted this at 6:48 PM.

Sunday, May 11, 2003  

Finals ... AHHH! I have two tomorrow, and Nick's parents are here tonight. I have to go and spend time with them; if I don't, that'll be rude. :T Nick says, "You don't have to spend time with us tonight if you want." Uhhhhh, helllloooo? I think he just doesn't get it. I want to make a good impression! *pout* :) On the up side (and something to look forward to after my finals), might go to Buca's tomorrow night with them. Oooo, I'm so excited! It's Buca's! Yum! Good Italian food!

j posted this at 9:40 PM.