Thursday, May 06, 2004  

One take-home final and one final project to go ...

There is this temporary job that I applied for about a month ago. On the ad listing, the duration was listed as "April through July." Two days ago, a woman called me about going to an interview for this job. Now I don't know if I should call her back to set up an interview because what the heck about the discrepancy on the project start and end dates. It does, however, pay quite nicely and although it is a research assistant position, it is with a publication, so I can put that down on my resume for that publication experience I am *dying* to have. So, I don't know. I am mulling this over.

Trying to decide whether or not to go to Mimi's graduation. Looking at tickets and schedules and trying to get everything to work. Maybe. I don't know about this.

j posted this at 12:11 PM.

Wednesday, May 05, 2004  

Today I am feeling happier than yesterday. I was being unnecessarily panicky yesterday, I think. I told Nick at dinner about our friends breaking up, and he was shocked. Then he was like, "Oh, that makes sense now." Apparently, he saw them one day sitting together, crying, and did not want to ask why. He thought maybe someone died or something. Then we talked about my stupid insecurities about everything, and he told me I was just thinking silly girl thoughts and not to compare us with other people. So I am feeling better today.

It is a little bit cooler today than it was yesterday. It is still very hot, but at least it is cooler.

I have to start packing. Caroline left today, and with her stuff gone, it seems like there's a big empty space in our apartment. When I said bye to her last night, it was strange, like a "oh, good luck, have a nice life" type of thing. I don't know what to say in those situations. It's so awkward. What is an appropriate thing to say? Well, I thought Caroline was a good roommate. She didn't break any of my stuff and always washed her dishes. Two very excellent qualities. Haha. No, but honestly, I am very glad she came to live with me and Shannon because it has been a pleasant experience.

j posted this at 12:14 PM.

Tuesday, May 04, 2004  

The mood of the day is melancholy.

Half an hour ago, I learned that two of my good friends broke up. (They were dating each other.) Apparently, they've been broken up since the beginning of April, and each assumed the other had told me, but neither one actually had until today. It was casually alluded to like "Oh, now that so-and-so is dating this-person" when I was talking to my friend. I blinked and didn't make a big deal out of it; I just pretended I knew all along. But inside, my thoughts were very chaotic, and there were lots of questions swimming around. These friends had been together for four years now, and I can't believe they just broke up. It's so strange. One day you can be with someone and think everything is fine, and the next, you could be broken up. *sigh* It seems like one is dealing well with the breakup (she's dating someone else already), and the other (the one I talked to today) seems like he is having a hard time coming to terms with it. Poor guy. I feel like he's in a very bad place emotionally right now because not only is his ex dating someone else, but that someone else also happens to be friends with both of them. Wow. Talk about awkward situations.

I guess I just feel particularly melancholy about this news because I feel like there has been a lot of tension in my relationship with Nick lately. We have our good days and our bad days, of course, but lately it seems as if we have been having more of the bad ones. And it makes me think that if this can happen to our friends, then this can happen to us too. Not a very pleasant thought. I do not know if all this discontent is a phase in our relationship or if it is for real. Like the beginning of the end or something. All I know is that right now, sometimes it is hard to be around each other without fighting. I have a panicky feeling in the pit of my stomach that I really wish would go away.

j posted this at 2:05 PM.

Monday, May 03, 2004  

Last night, in an attempt to escape the intense heat of Nick's apartment (somehow, his place retains all the heat from the day and does not cool down until 3AM), we did something completely different and new. We drove out to this Greek restaurant that we'd heard about from some other people. It was so good! I had a chicken pita with rice pilaf and Greek salad, and after I had eaten everything, I felt supremely proud of myself for having eaten a very heathy and nutritious meal. Yay!

I'm worried about Meems. I hope she will be ok.

j posted this at 6:35 PM.